REVIEW (#3): THE CABIN IN THE WOODS by TIM LEBBON

"An army of nightmares, huh? Let's get this party started."

"Ok, I'm drawing a line in the fucking sand here. Do not read the Latin!"

★★★★☆  

3.75/5

This book was a reread for me and I've seen the movie more times that I'm comfortable acknowledging so I knew where I was getting into.

But... I don't know. The first time I read it I gave it five stars on Goodreads. Ok, maybe it was more like a 4.75, but the thing is that I really liked it.

So what happened this time? Maybe my love for the movie clouded my judgement that first time and now I've been more critical. 

"It was the pioneer days; people had to make their own interrogation rooms. Out of cornmeal."

The book is pretty much exactly the same as the movie. The plot, the funny quotes, the amazing killing unicorns... But one thing it's a little bit different: we read what the characters are thinking, and it's not that interesting. 

I understand they're horror movie stereotypes, but we only get that, we don't get the progression from normal people to the caricature characters in a horror movie, that's what we should've gotten, in my opinion.

"Good work, zombie arm."

In the movie I didn't feel that way, I understood that these people were changing every passing second, that the dudes in the office and everybody that worked in that secret company were manipulating these fools.

In the book Jules seems stupid from the beginning, even though she's pre-med. Curt, who is a sociology major, thinks like a over-sexualized dick. And Sitterson it's just creepy, I don't remember him being that creepy in the movie.

"We are not who we are... I'm gonna go read a book with pictures."

Anyway, it's a quick and fun book that maybe couldn't be perfectly adapted because the movie is really visual and that's pretty difficult to translate into a book. Who knows?

If the only good things about a book are the ones that the movie already gave you and nothing else, well... We have a problem. 

"I'm sorry I let you get attacked by a werewolf and then ended the world."

For all the normal folk out there I would tell you that is probably better that you just watch the movie. 

For the horror / Joss Whedon / The Cabin in the Woods obssessive nerds like me... I'm not gonna say anything to you 'cause you're probably reading the book already.

"Cleanse them. Cleanse the world of their ignorance and sin. Bathe them in the crimson of... Am I on speakerphone?"